NotWE: Thriller!
by 15animefreak15
Summary: Just a crack birthdayfic for my buddy nintendo-nut1. Set in her latest issue of the comic series, go check it out! VERY light EddxMarie & EddyxLee. When things get hairy, the surviving group turns to their only remaining hope... THRILLER!


**Okay, so this is a cracky, oneshot birthday fic for my bud, nintendo-nut1! She's awesome, and it's her 21st b-day today, so I wrote this especially for her~**

**It didn't turn out as funny as I'd hoped it would, and certainly more scary and sad than I wanted it to be, but meh. It's still funny in my eyes, and I hope it is for her, too. :3 And for all of you out there!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Thriller, or the characters/setting of Ed, Edd, 'n' Eddy, OR nintendo-nut1's awesome comic series. So please don't sue me. :P**

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The red Harvest Moon bathed the decrepit remnants of the cul-de-sac with ruby light, staining everything the color of blood that remained even when dark clouds obscured the light for brief moments. The small cluster of homes was dead silent aside from the howls of wolves and the calls of owls and ravens alike, not even the crickets daring to chirp in the quiet. Yet the beautiful silence could not last forever when living, breathing prey remained, drawing those cursed by the moon out from hiding. Thus the quiet of the Halloween night was broken by the sound of shoes slapping pavement and heavy panting as the small group of six made a mad dash across the crimson road. A few figures shambled along behind them, groaning and dragging their feet as they stubbornly chased their dinner.

The group itself was definitely a strange bunch, seeing as it included a werewolf and a werewolf-vampire hybrid. However, the humans of the group did not appear scared in the least of them, and actually looked rather concerned for the monsters. The only male human seemed to be leading the group, pointing at one of the houses and shouting between pants as he ran.

"C'mon, in there! The door looks sturdy enough and we can hole up in it for a while!" Eddy called over his shoulder, his loud voice easily carrying over all of the noise. The three girls, too tired to care, merely nodded and ran after the short boy. Their two beast companions followed as well, worried for their friends' safety in this zombie-infested cul-de-sac.

They reached the house in less than a minute and piled inside, Eddy slamming the front door shut behind them. "Help me move some stuff!" he shouted quickly. Together, the group managed to shove a moth-eaten couch in front of the door, and piled furniture in front of the window. Exhausted, they all collapsed against one of the living room walls and worked on catching their breath so they could formulate some kind of plan of action.

However, as always, Eddy took any chance given to him to tease his enemies, and he noticed Lee shaking a little. He smirked, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning against the wall as he gave her a sideways look. "You were _scared, _weren't you?" he asked, a little breathlessly.

Lee's head snapped up in an instant, and she sent Eddy a glare from behind her curly, orange bangs. "I wasn't_ that_ scared!" she growled in a warning tone.

Eddy simply held his smirk, though he turned his gaze away from the angry female. "You were _scared_..." he snickered.

_It's close to midnight_

_and something evil's lurking in the dark._

Lee looked like she was about to sucker punch Eddy, but May's sudden voice cut through the tension and surprised them both. "It's almost midnight already? No way!" she gasped, shocked.

"What? That's impossible. Where do ya see that at, May?" the older sister growled. The blond pointed at a surprisingly still-working clock on the wall, which indeed showed quite clearly that it was close to midnight.

Marie shivered, rubbing her bare arms and pulling her knees up to her chest. "God, this sucks. It feels like someone's watchin' us and I can't stand it. Even with that stupid moon, it's so dark in here," she muttered, obviously annoyed.

_Under the moonlight,_

_you see a sight that almost stops your heart._

Suddenly, May shrieked, making everyone present jump and whip around to stare questioningly at her. "L-L-L-LOOK!" She pointed a shaky finger at the barricaded window, where rotting arms and hands were probing through the furniture and swiping at the air.

_You try to scream_

_but terror takes the sound before you make it._

The others looked as if they wished to follow the blond's start and scream as well, but either could not do so or were too stubborn and prideful to let anyone see them so weak. Ed growled from his position in front of them and Edd bared his fangs, red-yellow eyes glowing dangerously in the dark.

"H-hey, it's okay guys. They can't get through it. Nothing to be s-scared about, haha..." Eddy stated, as usual trying to laugh the matter off in an effort to hide his own fear.

_You start to freeze_

_as horror looks you right between the eyes._

_You're paralyzed!_

However, the short boy froze as a pair of dim, glossy eyes stared straight into his own from a gap in the barricade. It was impossible to tell who they belonged to, but they froze Eddy straight to his core and he suddenly found it extremely hard to move.

_You hear the door slam_

_and realize there's nowhere left to run._

Suddenly, the sound of a door slamming somewhere in the house made them all scream, or yelp in the case of the werewolf and hybrid. The group leaped to their feet, tense and on-edge as numerous pairs of eyes nervously searched the darkness for any signs of movement.

"Where the heck did that come from?" Eddy whispered, though it was still relatively loud.

"I don't know, but I'm getting myself a weapon," Lee replied, picking up a half-rotted chair leg from the floor.

"Just don't hurt them too badly, Lee. They're still the same people and we might be able to cure them," Edd ground out in his strange, garbled voice. The ginger looked hesitant to comply, but finally nodded in agreement and gripped the makeshift weapon tighter.

_You feel the cold hand_

_and wonder if you'll ever see the sun._

Marie shivered suddenly as something colder than death landed on her shoulder, making her freeze as well. "Uh, g-guys...?"

"What's up, Mar-" Lee stopped mid-sentence as she fully turned around to face her blue-haired sister, nearly dropping the chair leg in her hands.

"...there's one right behind me, isn't there?" the younger sister asked, terrified. Lee merely nodded, very slowly, and Marie turned around to see a very tall, very _zombified_ Rolf standing there. She instantly shrieked and planted her fist into his face, sending him stumbling backwards to trip over a fallen bookcase and onto his back.

_You close your eyes_

_and hope that this is just imagination, girl._

Marie stumbled backwards, standing closer to Eddy and her sisters as their two furry protectors quickly leaped in front of them and growled threateningly at the zombie. Meanwhile, May had tightly closed her eyes and covered them with her hands, shaking hard as she muttered nonsense under her breath. _'None of this is real, it can't be real. I must be dreaming. I just dozed off at the party. These can't be real zombies...' _she thought desperately.

_But all the while_

_you hear the creature creeping up behind._

_You're out of time!_

The sound of shuffling drew May out of her thoughts with a gasp, and she simultaneously opened her eyes and whirled around. It was her turn to shriek as a zombified Johnny lunged at her, plank still cradled in his arms. She barely managed to dodge and he missed, hitting the carpet and rolling hard into a nearby wall. "They're everywhere! Where are they all coming from?" she shouted, close to tears.

_They're out to get you,_

_there's demons closing in on every side._

Indeed, whereas just a few minutes ago they seemed to have locked the zombies out of the house, more and more were gradually popping out of the woodwork. It was then Eddy came to a realization and promptly smacked his forehead with a gloved hand. "The back door! We never checked it! It could have been wide open and they just waltzed right in!"

_They will possess you_

_unless you change that number on your dial._

_Now is the time_

_for you and I to cuddle close together, yeah._

_All through the night_

_I'll save you from the terror on the screen._

_I'll make you see!_

May, desperate, lunged for a nearby phone and dialed 911, sweat beading her brow. A few seconds later she groaned and threw the receiver to the floor, quickly huddling back with the others. "The line's dead. I couldn't even get a dial tone!" she explained fearfully. Ed and Edd had taken up one side of the group each, while Eddy and Lee found themselves back-to-back in case any broke through.

"Here, you'll need this more than me, short stuff," Lee stated, handing Eddy the chair leg she had picked up earlier and cracking her knuckles.

Eddy scoffed, but took the weapon anyway and looked away as he answered huffily. "Yeah, well, whatever. I can take care of myself..."

"Sure ya can."

_"Darkness falls across the land._

_The midnight hour is close at hand._

_Creatures crawl in search of blood,_

_to terrorize your neighborhood._

_And whosoever shall be found_

_without the soul for getting down,_

_must stand and face the hounds of Hell_

_and rot inside a corpse's shell._

_The foulest stench is in the air,_

_the funk of forty thousand years,_

_and grizzly ghouls from every tomb_

_are closing in to seal your doom._

_And though you fight to stay alive,_

_your body starts to shiver._

_For no mere mortal can resist_

_the evil of the Thriller."_

Suddenly, they found themselves utterly surrounded, and situation looked bleak. May opened her mouth to ask what they should do now when a cold, wet nose suddenly pressed against her hand. She gasped and jumped slightly, looking over at Ed in puzzlement. He whimpered and jerked his head to the right, at the wall where she had found the phone and tried to call 911. May had completely missed the stereo resting beside it, along with a few scattered CDs.

"Hey... good thinking, Ed! Maybe some music will distract them and we can get away!" she exclaimed gleefully. Stepping over to the machine, she quickly scanned through the discs, looking for something that would distract zombies in a situation like this.

"I doubt it'll work, but I'm willin' to try anythin' at this point!" Lee shouted, slamming her fist into Kevin's jaw for a second time that night.

"A-ha! This should do the trick! I really hope this works..." May muttered, putting in the CD and turning the stereo on, making sure the volume was cranked. Within seconds, a very familiar beat filled the room and every head whipped around to stare at the blond and the machine.

"You have _got_ to be_ kidding me._ Thriller? Does this ilook/i like a music video to you?" Eddy shouted, exasperated at May's choice.

"What? It worked in the video! Who says it might not work on real zombies? Besides, it's the best one I could find in all this junk!" she snapped back.

"Well look harder! There's no way a song like that would-" Lee began, but was cut-off by her third sister.

"Would all of you shut your fat traps and _look?_" Marie shouted, grabbing Eddy and Lee's heads and twisting them around. The argument stopped instantly and several jaws dropped to the floor at the sight before them.

"...you can't be serious," Eddy was the first to mutter, eyes wide. Even Ed and Edd looked shocked, though Ed was dancing a little to the beat himself.

All of their zombified friends had shuffled together into a group and were performing the actual Thriller dance, with Rolf in the lead. The fact they were dancing at all was strange enough, but their perfect choreography made the sight even weirder, if not utterly hilarious.

_'Cause this is Thriller!_

_Thriller night_

_and no one's gonna save you_

_from the beast about to strike._

_You know it's Thriller!_

_Thriller night._

_You're fighting for your life_

_inside a killer_

_Thriller tonight, yeah!_

As hilarious as it was seeing their zombified friends dancing to Thriller in someone's living room, the group only allowed themselves a few moments before making a quick game plan. Edd had to remind Ed to stop dancing along several times and pay attention, but the werewolf seemed to at least hear what he was supposed to do.

"All right. They're blocking the exit to the hallway. We'll take the one that goes to the dining room, then head into the kitchen and out the back door. By the time the song's over, we'll be long gone. Everyone understand the plan?" Eddy whispered, trying not to draw the zombies' attention away from their choreography.

_That this is Thriller!_

_Thriller night._

_'Cause I can thrill you more_

_than any ghoul would ever dare try._

_(Thriller)_

_(Thriller night)_

_So let me hold you tight_

_and share a_

_(Killer, diller, chiller)_

_(Thriller here tonight)_

The others nodded, and together the six backed away from the dancing zombies towards the dining room. They moved as slowly as they dared, worried the song might end before they had left, and were careful not to tread on anything that would create a loud noise. The last thing they wanted to do was snap the zombies out of their strange trance. All of the humans had made it into the dining room when Edd suddenly realized one of their number was missing. His head snapped back towards the living room and he nearly banged his head against the wall in frustration when he saw Ed dancing to the music yet again.

Growling under his breath, he dashed silently back into the living room and grabbed Ed by the ear, making the werewolf whimper. Sending him a scolding glare, he half-dragged his furry companion back towards the dining room as the song neared its end. Unfortunately, Edd was not paying as much attention to where he was going as he should have been, and trampled on the tail of a passing black cat just as they entered the other room. It seemed perhaps they were bad luck after all, as the feline screeched painfully loud and ran off, sending numerous things clattering and shattering to the floor.

_That this is Thriller!_

_Thriller night._

_'Cause I can thrill you more_

_than any-_

"Shit!"

The music cut-off with a screech, though it was in a stereo, and suddenly all eyes were on Edd. The hybrid blinked a few times, realizing he had sworn and almost blushed. Even the zombies appeared shocked, and Ed was staring up at his partner with wide, yellow eyes.

"Holy... did Double D just _swear?_" Marie asked, mouth agape and eyes wide as she stared at her boyfriend.

"That's it! It's really the end of the world! We're doomed," Eddy declared, slapping a gloved hand over his eyes dramatically.

Edd's long, furry ears drooped slightly and he suddenly looked sheepish. "Oh, uh, erm... pardon my language..." he muttered a bit late, embarrassed. He looked up in surprise and confusion, however, when those not zombified began laughing. "What's so funny?"

"Aw, c'mon, sockhead! Don't tell me ya thought we were serious! It's great that you're finally actin' your age!" Lee answered, chuckling and grinning at the hybrid.

"So you swore, so what? You're a teenager, aren't you? It's about time if you ask me, after all that's been happening lately. So just get over it!" Eddy added with a smirk as the zombies seemed to return to themselves with a few audible groans and some shuffling.

"Let's get out of here guys! We can save the laughter for _after _we fix this mess!" Marie called from the kitchen entryway, though the smirk was evident on her lips as she looked over at Edd. The hybrid merely blushed under his fur as the group ran through the kitchen and out the back door, the zombies trailing after them yet again.

He really would have to watch his language.

_For no mere mortal can resist the evil of the **Thriller**..._

_...and neither can zombies, apparently._

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**Yes, it's a songfic. I think it fits. And Thriller pwns, so there. :P And you probably won't get the "shit" joke unless you watch nintendo-nut1 on DA. X'D**


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